When the first thought you have in the morning is "Why isn't this Friday!?!??!?!?!?!" ... you KNOW it is not going to be a good day... And, it wasn't.
Still reeling a bit from the news of last night, I woke up, not in a bad mood, but just tired.. in almost every sense of the word, and certainly physically tired. But, mostly I was just worn out emotionally and mentally. So, because my mind was not totally coherent this am, it took me a bit longer to pick out an outfit (which I usually do mentally while laying in bed as I fall asleep the night before), my hair took a while to fix.. I missed my long "pull up in a pony tail and go" style this morning.
Thankfully I "accidentally" made the coffee a little strong.. Thank you Jesus!
I am learning a lot. I know, I keep reminding myself of this. I am purposefully learning in school, and dragging my feet learning at work, but even still I will praise Him. Work was not pleasant today, and I still am working through how to change my attitude and perspective because it is not good nor anything resembling it.
I left work thinking "what am I doing?!?! I. Am. Stupid...."
Thankfully my coworker/friend and I made plans to go out for dinner.. and we did.. and laughed at random things and the ridiculousness that is our life, and the things that make us "that girl." Then, I returned my mom's phone call because she somehow always knows when I am not ok, and had left me a voice mail saying "I was thinking of you, wondering how you are doing, and hoping you are having a good day..." I. Love. Her. We chatted for a while, swapped frustrations from work, and were reminded how much life can suck, but how much that ultimately does not change things.. I love her, she loves me, God loves us both.. and in the end, at the end of the day.. God makes the stupidity that is us ok again.
Life is crazy, but God will get me through this, and whatever is coming around the corner. I have NO idea what His plan is for this seemingly never ending plight of either stupidity or insanity on my part.
Thankfully I was able to then come home and laugh with a couple of my roomies, about I am not even sure what.. But, regardless, we laughed for a while.
Life is hard, God is good.