So, it has been an interesting last while. I keep thinking back over the last couple days, the massive amounts of emotions, the total void of any feeling at all, the struggle to feel normal again, the totally content moments.. everything seems to have piled on and fallen off this past little while.
Yesterday I was mulling over the idea of love. How much does God love us?... How much do I love those around me?.. Where is my line, and do I confuse love for something else when I feel like it?
One of my roomies and I were talking, and she told me about a podcast she had listened to, and how the pastor said "God's love for you isn't expressed in your circumstances, it was expressed on the cross." Which is such a great way of explaining it I think. So often, we forget that He ALREADY did everything we need in order to be loved. We feel the need to bemoan whatever situation we are in, claim, feel, and ask where's God? When in actuality, He already showed us what we need to know and has told us what we need to know.. we just stop listening.
Then, I re-found these verses: "Then the LORD answered Job out of the storm. He said:... Brace yourself like a man; I will question you, and you shall answer me. "Where were you when I laid the earth's foundation? Tell me, if you understand"...."Have you ever given orders to the morning, or shown the dawn its place"... "Do you send the lightning bolts on their way? Do they report to you, 'Here we are'?" - Job 38:1,3,4,12,35
And was reminded, my God is THAT big.. and still loves me more than I can really measure or count.
That got me thinking. Why do I love those around me?.. Because of who they are? What they can do for me? Because they serve some purpose to me?... Maybe sometimes.. but honestly, most of the time, I care and love those around me just because. I have no ulterior motive, no underlying goal, no agenda in the relationship... I just care about virtually whoever I meet just because I can. I am very thankful that God made me this way. I cannot think of a single person I have met that I did not care at all how they are if I knew/know them beyond basic one time meeting... and sometimes I meet someone once and they find a place in my heart right away.
I have had people ask me "why do you care?.. It doesn't involve or effect you.." and a lot of times that is true. Situations other people find themselves in, if I can I help.. if I cannot do anything then I just pray.. often times I do both.
Last night I was laying on one of my best friends beds and we were not doing anything but just laying there chatting and playing around on our phones. And, I began detailing out my thought process on a particular situation.. I was invited to go join some friends to hang out for the evening... I wanted to go, but the reality was the drive was too long for the time of evening I was invited, not to mention the logistics of getting home and going to work the next day would have meant a grand total of only a few hours of sleep. But, once I went through all the basics I began talking about my heart in the situation...
I want to be wanted. (who doesn't?!) I just did an entire post on the desire to be found beautiful and noticed. The thing is, if I am totally honest, I really do not think I would be wanted as much as someone else, not even in a woe is me situation, just knowing bits of information like I do. I would have ended up being "good enough" but, it would not have been what they wanted most.
Just interesting tid bits of thoughts. My prayer is that the God of all Peace and Understanding helps me "get" it correctly. See His plan, His love, His will.. everything. And that, through it all He will be glorified regardless of the cost to me... Although, I do struggle with the fear of things sometimes.. But, that too shall pass.
Showing posts with label Job 38. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Job 38. Show all posts
Jan 14, 2010
Sep 30, 2009
Where Were You?...
Ok... So this speaks to me recently.. A LOT.
(Job 38)
The LORD Speaks
1 Then the LORD answered Job out of the storm. He said:
2 "Who is this that darkens my counsel
with words without knowledge?
3 Brace yourself like a man;
I will question you,
and you shall answer me.
4 "Where were you when I laid the earth's foundation?
Tell me, if you understand.
5 Who marked off its dimensions? Surely you know!
Who stretched a measuring line across it?
6 On what were its footings set,
or who laid its cornerstone-
7 while the morning stars sang together
and all the angels shouted for joy?
8 "Who shut up the sea behind doors
when it burst forth from the womb,
9 when I made the clouds its garment
and wrapped it in thick darkness,
10 when I fixed limits for it
and set its doors and bars in place,
11 when I said, 'This far you may come and no farther;
here is where your proud waves halt'?
12 "Have you ever given orders to the morning,
or shown the dawn its place,
13 that it might take the earth by the edges
and shake the wicked out of it?
14 The earth takes shape like clay under a seal;
its features stand out like those of a garment.
15 The wicked are denied their light,
and their upraised arm is broken.
16 "Have you journeyed to the springs of the sea
or walked in the recesses of the deep?
17 Have the gates of death been shown to you?
Have you seen the gates of the shadow of death?
18 Have you comprehended the vast expanses of the earth?
Tell me, if you know all this.
19 "What is the way to the abode of light?
And where does darkness reside?
20 Can you take them to their places?
Do you know the paths to their dwellings?
21 Surely you know, for you were already born!
You have lived so many years!
22 "Have you entered the storehouses of the snow
or seen the storehouses of the hail,
23 which I reserve for times of trouble,
for days of war and battle?
24 What is the way to the place where the lightning is dispersed,
or the place where the east winds are scattered over the earth?
25 Who cuts a channel for the torrents of rain,
and a path for the thunderstorm,
26 to water a land where no man lives,
a desert with no one in it,
27 to satisfy a desolate wasteland
and make it sprout with grass?
28 Does the rain have a father?
Who fathers the drops of dew?
29 From whose womb comes the ice?
Who gives birth to the frost from the heavens
30 when the waters become hard as stone,
when the surface of the deep is frozen?
31 "Can you bind the beautiful Pleiades?
Can you loose the cords of Orion?
32 Can you bring forth the constellations in their seasons
or lead out the Bear with its cubs?
33 Do you know the laws of the heavens?
Can you set up God's dominion over the earth?
34 "Can you raise your voice to the clouds
and cover yourself with a flood of water?
35 Do you send the lightning bolts on their way?
Do they report to you, 'Here we are'?
36 Who endowed the heart with wisdom
or gave understanding to the mind?
37 Who has the wisdom to count the clouds?
Who can tip over the water jars of the heavens
38 when the dust becomes hard
and the clods of earth stick together?
39 "Do you hunt the prey for the lioness
and satisfy the hunger of the lions
40 when they crouch in their dens
or lie in wait in a thicket?
41 Who provides food for the raven
when its young cry out to God
and wander about for lack of food?
(Job 38)
The LORD Speaks
1 Then the LORD answered Job out of the storm. He said:
2 "Who is this that darkens my counsel
with words without knowledge?
3 Brace yourself like a man;
I will question you,
and you shall answer me.
4 "Where were you when I laid the earth's foundation?
Tell me, if you understand.
5 Who marked off its dimensions? Surely you know!
Who stretched a measuring line across it?
6 On what were its footings set,
or who laid its cornerstone-
7 while the morning stars sang together
and all the angels shouted for joy?
8 "Who shut up the sea behind doors
when it burst forth from the womb,
9 when I made the clouds its garment
and wrapped it in thick darkness,
10 when I fixed limits for it
and set its doors and bars in place,
11 when I said, 'This far you may come and no farther;
here is where your proud waves halt'?
12 "Have you ever given orders to the morning,
or shown the dawn its place,
13 that it might take the earth by the edges
and shake the wicked out of it?
14 The earth takes shape like clay under a seal;
its features stand out like those of a garment.
15 The wicked are denied their light,
and their upraised arm is broken.
16 "Have you journeyed to the springs of the sea
or walked in the recesses of the deep?
17 Have the gates of death been shown to you?
Have you seen the gates of the shadow of death?
18 Have you comprehended the vast expanses of the earth?
Tell me, if you know all this.
19 "What is the way to the abode of light?
And where does darkness reside?
20 Can you take them to their places?
Do you know the paths to their dwellings?
21 Surely you know, for you were already born!
You have lived so many years!
22 "Have you entered the storehouses of the snow
or seen the storehouses of the hail,
23 which I reserve for times of trouble,
for days of war and battle?
24 What is the way to the place where the lightning is dispersed,
or the place where the east winds are scattered over the earth?
25 Who cuts a channel for the torrents of rain,
and a path for the thunderstorm,
26 to water a land where no man lives,
a desert with no one in it,
27 to satisfy a desolate wasteland
and make it sprout with grass?
28 Does the rain have a father?
Who fathers the drops of dew?
29 From whose womb comes the ice?
Who gives birth to the frost from the heavens
30 when the waters become hard as stone,
when the surface of the deep is frozen?
31 "Can you bind the beautiful Pleiades?
Can you loose the cords of Orion?
32 Can you bring forth the constellations in their seasons
or lead out the Bear with its cubs?
33 Do you know the laws of the heavens?
Can you set up God's dominion over the earth?
34 "Can you raise your voice to the clouds
and cover yourself with a flood of water?
35 Do you send the lightning bolts on their way?
Do they report to you, 'Here we are'?
36 Who endowed the heart with wisdom
or gave understanding to the mind?
37 Who has the wisdom to count the clouds?
Who can tip over the water jars of the heavens
38 when the dust becomes hard
and the clods of earth stick together?
39 "Do you hunt the prey for the lioness
and satisfy the hunger of the lions
40 when they crouch in their dens
or lie in wait in a thicket?
41 Who provides food for the raven
when its young cry out to God
and wander about for lack of food?
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